I see how it is, David Plouffe....

Would it kill him to write me an email that simply asks me how I'm doing? I get the feeling him and his friend Barack are only after my $10 a month gift.

For instance, last night I woke to the sounds of pebbles hitting my window. I trudged out of bed to look outside, only to see David looking haggard and stressed.

Nisi, He said, I am so happy to see you. I'm here, at three a.m., to share with you an alarming situation in our country today. You see, in July a focus group made of bookies released a statement that encouraged the American People (tm) to place bets on a young stallion named Dolemite for this years Breeder's Cup. Ordinary Americans like you and me took this as encouragement to place their hard earned dollars on Dolemite-

David, I interrupted, I'm not a gambler.

Which is good! He affirmed. You are correct to not want to gamble away your right to health care, a college education, and a decent wage for eight more years of the same corrupt bookie administration. I'd like to tell you about a man named Dave- he is a hard working grassroots organizer who took for granted what the powers that be told him was a sure bet. Little did Dave know that these "powers that be" were not out to serve his best interests. No no, they were Las Vegas fatcats who took advantage of Dave's yearning for a 16-1 odds payoff. Dave now feels betrayed...he's turning into a cynic- he is also rather concerned with the Bookie's policy of leg separation should he not come through with their "loser tax".

Can you take a stand against these pork barrell methods and help restore Dave's sense of hope by donating $25 today to Barack Obama's campaign? Might I also mention that checks are environmentally wasteful, but cash would suffice as it is a renewable resource.

All aboard the pixie express....

Yet again, I have chopped off a sizeable chunk of my hair and am quite satisfied with the results. I have enough length to pull off a haphazardly chaotic fro and enough different layers to comb it all forward for a very short pageboy.

And sure enough, I have recieved the following gendered reactions-

Ladies-
Omigosh, it's so CUTE (key-ooo-te)!
I wish I could go that short!
It suits you so well!
Good for you!

Gentlemen-
Oh, wow, you chopped off your hair.
That's nice....good for the summertime, I guess.
Nice do. (from gay men)
I'm not saying I don't like it, I'm just saying that I need to get used to it... (one person in particular)


Someone, either a comedian or somebody I actually know, once went on a diatribe about men's and women's attitudes towards boyishly short hair on women. It's common knowledge that most men prefer long hair. That's fine. I happen to think that most people look better with hair above their shoulders- there's such little versatility in having a bunch of strait pieces of hair taper to one's mid-back.

With that said, apparently women take a passive aggressive, sneaky bitch approach when it comes to the art of the coif compliment. Where, as is so often the case with the fairer sex, what they say and what they mean are two very different things...

what they say-
It's so cute! It really brings out your face, so daring!

what they mean-
BWAHAHAHAHAHA, you dumb bitch! No man will want your lesbo ass now, more for meeee! Why on earth would you want to draw attention to your face???

Now is this really the case? I can't say for sure. Somehow I'm going to give the gals the benefit of the doubt here and maybe just assume that many of them have been tempted to go short at one time or another and just haven't been able to do it for whatever reason- insecurity, culture, massochistic pleasure in spending 30 minutes a day with a blowdryer and curling iron.... therefore when one of us goes into don't-give-a-flying-fuck mode, we are genuinely happy for one another.

Women taking pleasure in each other's successes? I've gone mad with optimism. But I do know that I really do look better, as I always do when I lose the battle against growing out my hair.

BTW-

I wanted to take a picture but apparently my camera decided to travel to the big e-waste dump in the sky. Here's my cut on Winona, who can do a much better job convincing the masses that short = sexy -